New Moon in Gemini reading…how do I see myself and what can I do about that? Looks like it’s about writing more, worrying less, and generally feeling like the boss of me.

Hello again!

The new moon was yesterday, and today I did a quick Tarot reading using the spread that @the.word.witch posted on Instagram with the intentions: “For clearing your vision of self. For acceptance of disparate parts. For reflecting self-worth.”

Sounds good! A friend of mine called this spread “confronting,” and I have to admit those are my favorite kind of spreads. I only allow myself two a month now anyway, for the new and full moons, and other than that I only draw a card a week. WOW! That’s a huge change from what I was doing last year. I have been posting about my card of the week practice on Instagram for months now, but maybe I will do some sort of big post about it here one of these months. I want to pull out all the weekly cards I’ve had so far and see how the progression of energies has so neatly paralleled my life events (and my feelings about those events). But for now, I’ll just post about this new moon spread.

Here’s the original graphic that the creator (Claire) posted on Instagram:

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And here are my cards:

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  1. The Mirror – the aspect of self that needs to be looked at right now: Page of Pentacles. This feels like it’s about what I have to offer to the world in the form of my SELF. Whatever VALUE I offer to others. And that is a question I have been asking myself for awhile now. You see, I was all set to launch a fancy new website this spring when I had both life circumstances and my own self-confidence take a big tumble. BIG. I was left with more questions than understanding about how to proceed with everything in my life. You know that saying about having the “wind knocked out of you?” Well, I felt like I’d had the fire knocked out of me. Dowsed, I suppose. Put out with a ridiculous amount of water. No fire left. No primal energy of inspiration and drive to create. No excitement about life and my place in it. Just…cold and wet. Difficult emotions took center stage for awhile and I didn’t even recognize the person who had once been poised to launch a website that was meant to connect others in fun, fiery ways! I wouldn’t have known where to start anymore.
  2. The Reflection – what you perceive when you look at it (perceptions are not equal to reality): The World. Well, I think this could mean many things! But first of all it feels like I am perceiving the self-imposed pressure that goes along with “putting myself out there” to the world, and what might everyone be expecting? Will I disappoint them? Is it better not to try? Given that my big stalled project is a website, this also makes me think of the World Wide Web. I vaguely recall (and correct me if I’m wrong) that the four “fixed” signs of the zodiac are represented here, which might hint at my rigid thinking about “how things have to be” before they are worthy of sharing with others.
  3. The Distortion – what is distorting your vision or causing you not to see clearly: The Ace of Swords. Ah, yes. WRITER’S BLOCK!!! What do I have to say, anyway? How best to say it? What is the mission behind the communication, and how can I get past feeling like I have to know all of this before just taking the d*mn sword and putting metaphorical pen to paper to make something…anything. Beginning something is just that – a beginning. Why do I feel I have to know the whole path before beginning the journey? Where’s that Ace + Fool energy I started this whole Tarot blog with anyway? 😉
  4. The Lighting – what can you adjust/let in to see yourself with more compassion: Page of Swords. Looks like me allowing myself to learn as I go. What a concept.
  5. The Smudges – what you can clear away to see yourself with more clarity: The Two of Wands reversed. Fear of not being safe somehow if I venture out without fully formed plans.
  6. The Mirror (2) – a truer image of yourself: The Queen of Wands! Okay, THIS is the person I felt like when I was planning my website before! Excited about life and my place in it, and feeling happy with myself and knowing I don’t need to answer to anyone else, anyway. The witchy queen has the energy I see slowly rising in myself again. She tells me that I don’t need to worry about anything. That I have a birthright to just sit where I am and make my own rules, hang out with other magical beings, and not get sidetracked wondering if I fit into the mold that anyone else might prefer me to fit.

So I’ve taken the first step already, by writing this reading up here first rather than posting it on Instagram and never posting anything here. I’m taking the next step right now by not spending the next hour of my life overthinking the organization of this post (and my entire blog for that matter) and just wrapping it up with a big THANK YOU to anyone who reads this. I would absolutely love to hear any comments you might have, either here or on my Instagram page. Much love to you!! xoxo

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